Disorder in the Courts

Summer 2007 CSANews Issue 63  |  Posted date : Aug 07, 2007.Back to list

From a book called “Disorder in the American Courts,” which includes stories of things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters who had suffered the torment of staying calm while these exchanges were actually taking place:

ATTORNEY: Doctor, before you performed the autopsy, did you check for a pulse?

WITNESS: No.

ATTORNEY: Did you check for blood pressure?

WITNESS: No.

ATTORNEY: Did you check for breathing?

WITNESS: No.

ATTORNEY: So then, it is possible that the patient was alive when you began the autopsy?

WITNESS: No.

ATTORNEY: How can you be so sure, Doctor?

WITNESS: Because his brain was sitting on my desk in a jar.

ATTORNEY: But could the patient still have been alive, nevertheless?

WITNESS: Yes, it is possible that he could have been alive and practising law.