Old Butch

Winter 2009 CSANews Issue 73  |  Posted date : Dec 12, 2009.Back to list

John was in the fertilized egg business. He had several hundred young layers (hens) called "pullets" and 10 roosters to fertilize the eggs. He kept records, and any rooster not performing went into the soup pot and was replaced. This took a lot of time, so John bought some tiny bells and attached them to his roosters.

Each bell had a different tone. So from a distance, John could tell which rooster was performing. Now he could sit on the front porch and fill out the efficiency reports by just listening to the bells.

John's favourite rooster, Old Butch, was a very fine specimen, but one morning John noticed that Old Butch's bell hadn't rung at all. When he went to investigate, John saw the other roosters busy chasing pullets with their bells-a-ringing, but the pullets could hear the roosters coming and ran for cover.

To John's amazement, Old Butch had his bell in his beak, so it wouldn't ring. He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job, then walk on to the next one. John was so proud of Old Butch that he entered him in the county fair; he became an overnight sensation among the judges. The result was that the judges not only awarded Old Butch the "No Bell Piece Prize", they also awarded him the "Pulletsurprise" as well.

Clearly, Old Butch was a politician in the making. Who else but a politician could figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace and screwing them when they weren't paying attention! So vote carefully – the bells are not always audible!