Yet Another Innovative Snowbird

A man in Newfoundland calls his son in Calgary two days before Christmas and says, "I hate to ruin your day, but I have to tell you that your mother and I are divorcing; forty-five years of misery is enough."

"Pop, what are you talking about?" the son screams.

"We can't stand the sight of each other any longer," the father says. "We're sick of each other, and I'm sick of talking about this, so you call your sister in Vancouver and tell her."

Frantic, the son calls his sister, who explodes on the phone!!

"No way they're getting divorced!" she shouts, "I'll take care of this."

She calls Newfoundland immediately and screams at her father, "You are not getting divorced. Don't do a single thing until I get there!! I'm calling my brother back, and we'll both be there by tomorrow. Until then, don't do a thing, DO YOU HEAR ME?" and she hangs up.

The old man hangs up his phone and turns to his wife. "Okay," he says. "they're coming for Christmas and paying their own way."

A Frequent Flyer Tale...

A guy sitting at an airport bar in Atlanta noticed a beautiful woman sitting next to him. He thought to himself, "Wow, she's so gorgeous she must be a flight attendant. But which airline does she work for?"

Hoping to gain her attention, he leaned towards her and uttered the Delta Slogan, "Love to fly and it shows?"

She gave him a blank, confused stare and he immediately thought to himself, "Nope, not Delta."

A moment later, another slogan popped into his head. He leaned towards her again, "Something special in the air?"

She gave him the same confused look. He mentally kicked himself, and scratched American Airlines off the list.

Next he tried the United slogan, "I would really love to fly your friendly skies?"

This time the woman savagely turned on him, "What the heck do you want?"

The man smiled, then slumped back in his chair, and said...."Ahhh, Air Canada!"